Contributed by klstacy_home
Description: Have Unique System of Keeping Books In This Little Shop;
"Pigs is Pigs" After All, Even In Chicago
Newspaper published in: Huntsville, AL
Page/Column: Section 2, Page 2, Column 6
HAVE UNIQUE SYSTEM OF KEEPING BOOKS IN THIS LITTLE SHOP
EVANSTON, Ill., Feb. 1 (AP) – The bookkeeping system, if any, employed by the Mesdames C. P. Straus and L. A. Withrow in the operation of their hat store would show at $10 loss.
It appears to be a unique system. Customer enters; buys hat; pays one of the partners; other partner immediately demands and receives her percentage. Simple and swift. No red tape.
Yesterday the procedure assumed the proportions of disorderly conduct, or at any rate, the police said so. Customers summoned officers and the partners were taken before Justice Sam H. Harrison. Each were booked for disorderly conduct, and in addition, each swore out a similar charge against the other.
Mrs. Straus lacked the $2 to pay thee fee for obtaining the warrant. Her partner kindly lent her the money. The court fined each $5 and again Mrs. Straus borrowed the money from her partner.
They appeared to be well satisfied, and left the court arm and arm
“PIGS IS PIGS” AFTER ALL, EVEN IN CHICAGO
CHICAGO, Feb. 1 (AP) – There is no telling where pigs will go when they get lost, even nice albino pigs like A. M. Matthews’.
Whether Mr. Matthews did the right thing by reporting his loss to the Gresham police station is a moot question. It must be remembered, as the desk sergeant pointed out, that policemen haven’t been paid in a long time, and pigs, properly assassinated, are just grand with mashed potatoes and gravy.
“But these were such nice pigs,” said Matthews. “Albinos. Some folks might even call their beautiful. I was taking the two of them to my farm for fattening.”
The desk sergeant sat in dreamy contemplation. He made a noise that sounded like “yum, yum.”
“I will tell my men,” said the sergeant, “that you have lost two pigs. My men are all hones and reliable. On the other hand.” – and the dreamy look returned – “pigs do make nice pork chops. The boys are a long ways from their last pay day and from the looks of things, are equally distant from their next. It is positively dangerous to even mention food to some of them.”
“I would like to get my pigs back,” said Mrs. Matthews. “After all, pigs is --“
“Exactly,” said the sergeant.
“—Pigs.” finished Matthews.
“Not forgetting,” said the sergeant, “pork chops.”